Ick on the dance floor

I go to India in 26 days … eeek!

There are many reasons why me travelling to India is kinda funny … this is one of them.

I hate to dance.  I hate the crowded dance floors and the loud crappy music and the morons bumping into you every 2 minutes and the constant spilling of drinks.  People if you are dancing then dance .. if you are drinking then drink, clearly you are not able to co-ordinate yourself to do both at once!

One particular night I was being forced to dance at the elephant and wheelbarrow.  It was either put up with it and dance, or stand by myself somewhere else in the pub and be a bored looser, which is normally what I do.  However this time I was on the dance floor moving in a way that somehow resembled dancing.  It was hot and sticky and I was starting to get fed up of being there.  I stop dancing and look for the best break in the pack of bobbing morons to escape through when I feel someone or something stand very close behind me.  Before I could move away I feel a wet slimy thing glide along the length of my neck.

I freak and my cat like reflexes kick in and I jump around to see what it is and freeze in horror.

It is an Indian guy.  Hair slick with gel, shirt half open and not to be racist but stinking of curry mixed with sweat.

My still stature and the fact that I didn’t scream encouraged the guy to lean in and say *hey hot mama*

I look to my so called friend for help and see her doubled over in laughter.

I look back at the guy now surrounded by his friends and just glare as I wipe my neck

Fire must have been burning in my eyes because without having to open my mouth to let loose such profanity it would make any fine upholding person blush he began to creep away .. I guess looking for his next victim.

Gone are the days when a guy hits on you asking what your star sign is … gone are the days where you get the look up and down with a *how you doin* … no … the Indian boys at the Elephant and Wheelbarrow go around licking girls necks and hoping for a positive reaction.